When Positive Change is Slow in Coming

BP Coach, Lisa Brown

This article comes from Biblical Parenting Coach Lisa Brown.

Waiting is hard. Whether it’s a new attitude or an annoying behavior that needs to stop. It takes time for a child’s heart to change. Waiting for God to change the heart requires patience, hope, and clear vision.

My name is Lisa Brown and I’m a Biblical Parenting Coach. I work with parents who have kids who struggle with anger issues, anxiety, impulsivity, hard time self-regulating emotions, dishonesty and are defiant. Their family life is intense, rocky, stressful and so often the parents are at the end of their ropes. I get it. I’ve been at the end of my rope too. See Bad days need this positive tool.

A verse from the Bible that helps me while I’m waiting for my struggling child to change comes from Isaiah 40:31. May you also be encouraged by this scripture!

But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

God wants to comfort you while you faithfully work through a parenting plan to help the heart of your child. He desires for you to put your hope and trust in Him. God will do a new thing in your child’s heart. He has plans for you and your son or daughter. Rest in this truth, let go of your worries, let God renew your strength today.

You may be tired of your child’s arguing with you about everything. Or you may be worried sick because your child doesn’t control his anger and you’re anxious about another episode of him loosing it. See 10 Truths about a Child’s Anger parents must understand.  You may be growing weary and faint, but God wants you to put your hope in Him and He will renew your strength.

You been suffering long oh tired one, but praise him anyway, because He will not leave you to raise your beloved child on your own. He will direct your paths. You must remember He loves your child more than you could ever possibly love His child.

Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.

Psalm 42:11 

Put your hope in Him and He will save you and your children. He is working in every heart that cries out to him. He hears you and sees you. Praise God for this night and day. In the midst of exhaustion, frustration, anxiety, God calls you His own and He is with you through your long nights when you suffer with heartache. Your suffering is only for a little while and you will soar like an eagle in due time.

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.   Romans 5:3-4

You are changing during this challenging season. God is doing something new in you and developing your character. You will be so much stronger and have so much more understanding in the near future. This is only a season and even though it may seem like a very long season, this too shall pass.

You love your child and you carry such a heavy burden. It’s time to surrender and look to the Holy One who knows your future.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

God will not fail you. This season of parental challenges is all part of the plan. You’ll want to pay attention to every moment your child responds with kindness, or repents after settling down, or does a kind deed, and whether you see it or not, your child is changing minute by minute.  Look to keep discipline positive by affirming approximately right behavior. His or her heart is rocking with all kinds of emotions, temptations, and strongholds. God is pulling weeds and He is teaching you to care for your child’s heart, the garden. Keep planting, watering, pulling weeds, and showering your garden, your child and your home, with praise.

Dear parent you will always feel the extra pain of your child’s growing up moments, but remember God has already suffered for us on the cross, and God didn’t intend for you to be your child’s savior. God’s son has come to save your child. Your job is to keep your eyes on the cross and your child will do the same when he or she sees you. You are your child’s inspiration, a role model, and you are the one who can show him or her the way to go and be instrumental in connecting them to God’s spiritual strength. You don’t have time to be weary, instead rest and be renewed, for tomorrow is another day filled with learning opportunities.

Lisa Brown is a parenting coach who specializes in working with parents of children ages 3 to 12 who are struggling with learning disabilities and emotional and behavior problems such as ADHD, ADD, Anxiety, and ODD. She works on the phone with people all over the US. Learn more here.


  • Janelle
    Posted at 15:07h, 01 July Reply

    Thank you Lisa for this encouraging message! It was exactly what I needed to hear.

  • Jennifer Frost
    Posted at 18:55h, 17 July Reply

    This email came at the perfect time. Often times I can endure but then we come to another intense season and I am exhausted. it also seems that no one understands how intense the struggle is with an intense child…and then we bear more blame. Blamed by our child ,blamed by our friends, failing and flailing. This article is so amazing because I love how you call us to return to God’s word which does not condemn us and is so refreshing!

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